Nandana SGS MMS 104
Sep 11 2012
Speak lovingly to the elderly ~ 11 Sep 2012
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Mata (Mother), Pitha (Father), Guru and then God. These days that reverence to parents comes with a rider.. it is valid until mother becomes grandmother, and father becomes grandfather. The moment they become grandparents they aren’t ‘grand’ anymore. One of the banes of the modern world is our disregard for the elderly. There was a time when all in a family lived together.. children, parents, grandparents, great grandparents, uncles, aunts… a large happy joint family. In the name of enhancing our material wealth, expanding our sense of privacy and freedom, we have shrunk that joint family. That shrinking impacts the young and the old. Its impact on the young will show as the kids grow up. But its impact on the elderly is immediate.. is devastating. We may not intend it.. but that is how we make them feel.
Faced with increasing demands from work, facebook, television, children, kitchen, partying and picnics, we don’t have time for the elderly. We hardly speak to them. If we do, we talk ‘at’ them rather than talking ‘to’ them. Some of them take it silently. Some give it back.. like angry kids do.. and that further hurts them. And the man and the lady of the house can’t help it.. “Why can’t the old man and old lady understand our pressures at office, and our plight with the kids homework? Can’t they leave us alone.. They have their own room, their own tv, their own books.. why not leave us alone? See, we love them.. we want them to be happy. We can give them everything.. but our time. One seven year old feels like two.. Add one or two seventy year olds.. and it gets really really tough. What to do.. we do get angry with elders at times”.
So, we lose the ability to speak lovingly to our elders. So, the population in old age homes is on the rise, with the rise in bank balances of their sons and daughters. Appaji may say it in a 100 MMS messages – Be the change you want to see in others – but we seem helpless in expecting elders to be more patient, get less angry, be more silent.. than we can be. Such a huge gap between knowing and doing!
Not anymore! Our Gurudeva has transformed us with a single visual in this MMS.. His Holiness stands there with a walking stick ( want to see that again? ).. expressionless.. and that standstill feel reflects in the background of the water body that’s stopped flowing. Dear Appaji, We always want that blissful smile on your face. Oh! You don’t want to smile, now. You are asking if we see you in the elderly? And, if we say yes, your are asking if that be so, will we treat them the way we do? You are disappointed with us because we are not being grateful to those who brought us into this earth at a time and in place where you are around? We understand. We apologise.
Dear Gurudeva! Ever since we saw you, and heard you in this MMS, we are reformed. We see you in all the elderly. We treat them with the same love and reverence that we treat you. We bring back the ‘grand’eur in the lives of our grandparents. We bring back the sunshine into their darkness. So, when we sing “Govinda Gopala” ( Sung by Chinmaya Sisters – Track 23 – CD2 – Album : Swamiji 70) with them, we know they will really feel that sananda – happiness.. overflowing like that stream in the final frames. Our reverent pranams at your holy feet, Thathaji.
Jaya Guru Datta. Your Puttuji.
Gukarassyad gunatito rupatito rukarakah
Guna rupa vihinatvat Gururityabhidhiyate !!
Humble prostrations to the lotus feet of Parama Pujya Sri Rama Sadgurudeva !!
Om Srinivasaya Namaha !! Om Namo Hanumathe Namaha !! Sri Guru Datta !!
Jai Guru Datta Appaji. A wonderful lesson for our young people indeed!
In our culture in Switzerland elder people have non value, the society looks them as ballast. So we rare not very friendly with them. It is a problem, because we have more and more elder people and they cost the society a lot of money. when we see only this part, we are angry. But one day all of us are old. We must ask us: How I want be handeled by the younger people? Then I must make just that. When I am lovingly to them, it gives for both of us good feelings. The elder person is happy and because I have make she happy, I am also happy. It doesn’t cost anything to be lovingly, it is so simple. Why we speak often in a bad way? We must alwys think, that one day we are in the role of the elder people. Then I would like to be more than only ballast,
Yesterday, I had a long conversation at lunch with one of the students from the community college where I teach. He is filled with ideas, filled with a fire to change the world, to make things better. With all that he wants to do, he would need at least 10 different academic degrees and about 20 lifetimes to do it in, so I tried to advise him to pick that which he was most interested in to focus on as a major and as a way to really bring some of his ideas together. This he did not want to hear, instead, he pointed out to me that if you wanted to go to Mars and only landed on the moon, you had accomplished something, but if you only wanted to go the moon and never left earth’s atmosphere, you hadn’t done much. Wisdom and experience weren’t going to work here, but this conversation was good for me because it made me see that there was still this young zeal, hope and faith in the world. He needed to be tempered a bit by what I had to offer and I needed his zest for life. The young and the old balance each other, without the young, the old might despair, without the more wise elders….well….:}
Jai Guru Datta
Dear APPAJI
Try to give my very best to speak lovingly to all people, because if others are happy i feel happy too :-))))
OM NAMO HANUMATE NAMAHA
jaya guru datta sree guru datta sadgurudeva.when we talk with any elders lovely.they are happy and we are also happy.thank you for giving the nice message.jaya gur datta appaji.
{jai rama sree rama jaya jaya rama seeta rama} we all are happy about the count of ramayana is 13 crores.jgd
Jai Guru Data
Guruji, thanks for these wise words. Will do my best to follow it and try to instill this in my little one too. Thankyou!
Sri Guru Datta
Om Namo Hanumate Namah!
Good
Jaya Guru Datta. My parents and my grandparents are no longer with me and I miss them all. Some of my fondest memories are of my grandmothers cooking and baking something wonderful for me. Or my Grandfather talking to his birds and making me laugh. It’s true, as my parents got older and I was fully engaged in my career in another city, I didn’t get to see them that often and it was too easy to forget about what life was like for them. However, when I moved to New York City, I would call my mom for a lunchtime chat every Monday. I couldn’t be with her physically but we got to talk and laugh like girlfriends at least once a week. Sometimes she just needed someone to listen so I listened. It didn’t matter what she wanted to talk about but rather the time we spent focused on each other.
One time I went to visit them in Florida and had a profound conversation with my Mom. She was a devout Catholic and was always apprehensive about my interest in yoga, meditation etc. However, this time we talked of spiritual matters and experiences. She told me about a wonderful experience she’d had praying in front of a statue of the Blessed Mother Mary. As she described it, I related my story of having that “shaktipat” experience with my Guru. She also confided in me that she believed in reincarnation! I was surprised because the Catholic Church does not approve. But she felt like she could discuss it with me and so we did.
I realized that our lunchtime chats had connected us in a way that dissolved the boundaries of mother/daughter, age, lifestyle and beliefs. We had reached a point where we completely trusted each other not to judge or criticize but just to accept. When she became sick and she knew she didn’t have much longer, she turned to me to discuss the inevitable. I could tell that she was grateful to have someone who would listen to her wishes and assure her that they would be honored. I felt very blessed to be that person. I would gladly be that person for others and because of this sweet reminder from Swamiji, I will take extra effort to greet and act kindly toward the elderly every day. Since I am now in Florida, I will have many opportunities!
Jaya Guru Datta…..It is true what Sri Swamiji says, in the hustle and bustle of everday life we forget our spiritual goal and when problems pop up, we conveniently blame it on our busy lives. It is good to stop sometimes, look at our lives and put some TLSC (tender loving spiritual care) into problems. Anything infused with love, will always be a success. Jaya Guru Datta
Dear Appaji I am So grateful to you where I recently lost my Insulin Dependent Mother 73 years old couple of months before. Appaji in last 4 to 5 Years on all your Anugra Bhasha I could hear saying who is mother, How we should treat her, How we should worship her, How we should keep her happy. It is all your guidance which now when I feel when she is not with me made me to do great punya and made me a great son in our family. The proof of pudding is in eating is the one which I could see my sisters who are staying away from me, when we assembled for the rituals where my mother had told them and written to them that kumar is taking care in a great manner and saying that Sri Swamji might have asked him to do so? Om Namo Hanumate Namaha Jaya Guru Datta Pranams Sadguru Deva Pranams Sri Bala Swamiji. Sri Guru Datta Sri Mata Sri Mata Sri Mata
JGD. Even a fleeting smile gladdens the heart of the elderly. My late mother expressed this to me along with a scolding a long time ago. Prostrations to Sadguru. Mata Pita Guru Daivam Bhaje.
Jai Guru Datta,
this is a big subject and I don´t want to exclude myself from those who are entwisted in their own lives, too much as to think and take care of others, especially for the elder ones. I aslo have this egoistic streek and I´n not at all proud of it, so thank you for reminding me about this. Right now I´m buisy, but I´ll be old , too, not too far away from now and I know I´ll be
thankfull for anybody to give me loving attention – so I can´t expect that when I don´t do it myself. But this is just the old egoistic thinking again: to be friendly because I expect others to be friendly to me. Better to be simply friendly anyway.
JGD
JGD Appaji. Powerful MMS today. One side of the planet are nuclear families, fighting lone battles, earning loads of money, making properties, sending children to international schools…endless list. Yet, when they go back home, they return to what I think is vacuum. Children do not even know what it is to have grandparents at home. But their schools and offices ensure that they visit old age homes as a part of Corporate Social Responsibility initiative and spend quality time. Fashionable to say the least. Really, all those people only ask for love and affection and some time to talk to and be listened to. Bless us Appaji for us to realize this truth. We would all be in the same place and we would not want to regret then. JGD!!
Personally, I am really grateful to my upbringing as I read and absorb this MMS. My family is still a joint family and I have grown up with my own grandparents and their cousins. I have been very lucky to have them around me in my growing up years. Garandpa who would ensure that I study well and encourage me with lozenges and chocolates. Grandma who would ensure that I am well fed, she even used to play with me and feed me. It is my parents who have taught me to respect them, love them and give them loads of attention. Very lucky I am in this regard. Hoping that all children and elders realize the importance of having elderly around and giving them time and affection. Thank You Appaji, for blessing me with parents who have taught me these values. Pranams at your lotus feet and lots of love. JGD!
Jai Guru Datta. Sri Gurubyo Namaha. This MMS is very straight forward to the people who neglects their parents. Because of our parents we got our Sadguru. Everything we achieved in our life is the result of our parents pure dedication. I think todays MMS change the attitude of the people to a great extent, those who neglect their parents . Millions of Pranams to the Lotus feet of Pujya Sri Swamiji.
JGD Puttuji. Another thing has always puzzled me. I see a girl who continues to love her father and mother even after she gets married. She is kind and affectionate towards them. But she finds it so difficult to love the mother who bore, sacrificed, raised and made her beloved husband who he is today. She gets very impatient and intolerant of her presence in her life! Sure, there are exceptions. But this seems to be the general rule. Why does she not recognize in her husband’s education, talents, habits and virtues, the dedicated teachings of his mother and show respect and genuine affection towards her? She seems to give her the responsibility only to the husband’s faults. The same failure to recognize and appreciate the value of their upbringing by the parents, goes to the husband also. Elders these days are not revered for their wisdom and experience. They are only ridiculed for their ignorance and foolish faith in enduring values.
Jgd.OLD IS GOLD.The is not said in lighter vein.Experience, gained by prolonged exposure is valued as Gold.I worked in a Govt.Hospital where there is croud everyday.Poor people,uncared elders all folk there.We have 3 old age homes also.For the rich and poor.The rich pay fat fee and leave their old parents.Except love they have access to every thing.The young children of their families also do not visit them.A old cloth is not discarded but used to clean floor or car etc, like wise in some houses the old parents act as watchmen to small kids and the house.This is all because the morals are diluted.
JGD. Do animals, birds, insects or trees care for their aged parents or relatives? Not to my observation or knowledge. Only humans with the understanding of values such as compassion, gratitude, generosity, and sacrifice are capable of caring for the weak, the old, the disabled, and the downtrodden. Only humans have the choice of giving up a life of luxury and indulgence to lead a life of virtue, simplicity, and nobility.
That is what sets them apart from other living creatures and exalts them as human beings.
Are people who show a lack of such qualities worthy of being called humans? Is humanity alive and recognizable in them? How are they different from animals if all that they care about as adults are their own physical comforts, privacy to indulge in lustful pleasures, possessions to show off, and manipulative societal power?
Humans are endowed with memory to remember the favors and affection received from their elders. They have the capacity to pay back and clear their debts to them when they become adults and possess the required resources. If they fail to do so, their future births will be miserable and the future of those whom they have deprived, will also be miserable, our scriptures declare. The scriptures spell out to us what dharma is. Our gurus interpret for us the scriptures and they live their lives exemplifying those dharmic values. They stand before us as models of dharmic life.
Today’s society with its selfish mores is putting humanity itself in jeopardy, by disregarding the rules of dharma. It is paving the way for man to degenerate into a beast.
Many aged parents, relatives and revered teachers these days from affluent homes are relegated to old people’s homes to live like beasts in the cages of a zoo, given a place to sleep, food on their plate, and a doctor to treat when a need arises. The elderly are starved for attention and love. Regardless of their glory in their productive years, they become social rejects and are treated by their children as garbage when they get old. Many who live at home are treated as unpaid servants, cooks and baby sitters, starved for understanding and loving words.
Is this dharma? Is humanity alive?
Appaji is telling us to change our ways and to show more patience and benevolence.
Sri Guru Datta
Jaya Guru Datta Puttuji. What a sweet way to convey a powerful message!
Rama left the royal comforts of his kingdom abruptly, ready and willing, to live in the forest in exile for 14 years, killing demons as required, to protect the sages, performing his duty as a born warrior, vowing not to step into any kingdom until the end of the term, just to honor his aged father’s word given to his step mother, Kaikeyi. Such was the respect, love, loyalty, and gratitude that Rama felt towards his father who gifted him his human birth. Rama is hailed as a personification of dharma. Swamiji left his chance of being the cherished adopted son of a business tycoon in Mumbai, who shared his spiritual interests and faith in Sri Vidya, to live a life of excruciating challenges, celibacy, total renunciation of worldly relationships and attachments, of continuous wandering around the globe spreading the eternal values of dharma, facing insults and abuses, and dealing with ignorant persons of all levels and attitudes, to abide by his mother’s command to establish dharma in the world. Such is his respect, love, loyalty, and gratitude towards the mother who gave him birth and training. He guided and protected his father till the end with great respect and reverence, paving his way to salvation. He is hailed as a personification of dharma. The aim of dharma is the preservation of humanity.
Jai guru datta
We are blessed to recive such a mms it gives more advice and blessing to all of us because we also will be old so we should speak lovingly with old so we will also be treated like this in our olden days
So please kind to elderly people.
Even. I don’t follow this, from now I will follow this mms from today
Sri guru datta
Jaya Guru Datta. The rise in old age home admissions speaks volumes on the plight of the elderly at atomic homes. It is a direct lesson from Appaji asking us to be good children of His and thereby be responsible, affectionate children of our own parents. What is it that Appaji is teaching all these days, with such a painstaking effort? it is for us all to be the right children of His. If we dont follow what we see/hear/get instructed, the effort goes futile and we SHOULDNT do that. All the elderly at home want is just an affectionate 2-minute time from the grown-up kids. If we cannot spend that time with them – those who are responsible for what we are today – our accomplishments are no better than a used tissue paper. Those who brought us up (literally too) deserve at least a nice loving smile and an affectionate care. Thank You Appaji for the direct message. Sri Guru Datta
One day we too will be old ( with Appji’s blessings). Then what will happen to us? Lead now by example so that the young can learn how to treat us when we become old and sickly. Ingratitude is the worst sin! Time to give back to those who have given to us. Jaya Guru Datta. Om namo Hanumate namaha.
Jaya Guru Datta!
It is great to let elders also take part in our life and to take part in their life. Their cirlce of friends and relatives is shrinking. So the young generation is important for them. Happiness is shining back! They can teach us to give as we have teached them to give years before.
Sri Guru Datta
Om Govindaya Namah
Om Namo Hanumate Namah
JGD. Thank you Swamiji for this important reminder. JGD.
Jai Guru Datta! Dear Appaji- please send special blessings to Grandma Anna (G-G). She is the grandmother of my sister’s husband but she has moved to Baton Rouge and become grandmother to our whole extended family. She is nothing but light and love and today she baked us oatmeal cookies just to see us smile even though her back has been hurting. She is 88 years old. When she meets somebody new she hugs them so hard and sincerely it seems as if she has been knowing them for a lifetime. She is such a special person and we are so lucky to have her here with us… the very least i can do is pray to Swamiji to bless her and keep an eye on her. Sri Guru Datta! Hurray for G-G! Jai Hanuman!
Jaya Guru Hanuman,
Mother,Father,Guru,God – scriptures have provided this order for a reason. When we are born we do not know anything about the world. Only by drinking the milk of the mother we survive to see another day. Mother’s milk provides the lining in our stomach/intestine and gives us ability to even digest food in future. We are totally helpless in our intial years and dependent on our parents. It is our parents who show us the world. If they did not take care of us in the initial years of our lives we will not even know Guru or God. Just imagine what would have happened if parents would not have taken care of us even for a day when we are babies or toddlers?
After gaining strength in our body and standing on our feet we say we are independent. When our parents grow old and need our help we are busy running after something and ignoring them. How ungrateful are we? Let us bring back smile on our Guru’s face and change our ways, start loving our elders and be role models.
Humble prostrations to the lotus feet of Sri Swamiji
Om namo hanumate namaha
Jai Guru Datta !!
Pujya Gurudeva wants to protect seven generations !! Disrespect to elders make the Guru upset. How can we ever dare to pain our Gurudeva? Recall Guru Gita verses (67 and 101) No one can protect when the Guru is upset with our behavior.
When the ‘joint-family’ disappears, the very fabric that keeps the family connected is hamstrung. How we can leave elders in old-age home? Think of Appaji’s Amma Vodi !! Amma Vodi meaning mother’s lap is a social welfare project addressing the special needs of destitute women. Appaji sees HIS HOLY Mother in them. Appaji, please bless us to see You in every being.
I was fortunate to find my GURU when I was seven through my uncle and parents. I cannot imagine to what depths of the worldly ocean I would have drowned to without Gurudeva !!
Appaji, we will do things that make you happy, always want that blissful smile on your face!!
Sri Guru Datta !!Om Namo Hanumathe Namaha!!
This is what my parents taught me. It was by watching them that I learned it is the younger generation’s duty to show this respect and Love. To many youth these days have learned the opposite, thinking that the elders should be looking to them as being someone to seek. I am Grateful for my Appaji for this message to posterity. Speak not only Lovingly to elders, but to all. It is the Dharmic way. SGD
Speak lovingly to the elderly – 11/09/2012
Parents spend their entire life with all their love, care, energy and resources on their children, but unfortunately many a times children forget the efforts of their parents. It is the only way we can respect their efforts, because they ask for nothing other than our care. Sri Swamiji in His speeches and in counselling of younger generation insists that they should respect their parents and elders. Sri Swamiji’s message is wonderful, because all elderly people who are exhausted in life expect only little care from others. Let us all implement this in our life to make our parents and other elderly we meet happy.
One time I went to visit them in Florida and had a profound conversation with my Mom. She was a devout Catholic and was always apprehensive about my interest in yoga, meditation etc. However, this time we talked of spiritual matters and experiences. She told me about a wonderful experience she’d had praying in front of a statue of the Blessed Mother Mary. As she described it, I related my story of having that “shaktipat” experience with my Guru. She also confided in me that she believed in reincarnation! I was surprised because the Catholic Church does not approve. But she felt like she could discuss it with me and so we did.
I realized that our lunchtime chats had connected us in a way that dissolved the boundaries of mother/daughter, age, lifestyle and beliefs. We had reached a point where we completely trusted each other not to judge or criticize but just to accept. When she became sick and she knew she didn’t have much longer, she turned to me to discuss the inevitable. I could tell that she was grateful to have someone who would listen to her wishes and assure her that they would be honored. I felt very blessed to be that person. I would gladly be that person for others and because of this sweet reminder from Swamiji, I will take extra effort to greet and act kindly toward the elderly every day. Since I am now in Florida, I will have many opportunities!
Thank you Appaji, for such a sweet message and meaningful reminder!
JGD.Speaking pleasing words to every one costs nothing but gains a lot to both,that too to an elderly one with respects.The inner soul feels goodness to both,offer blessings automatically to the speaker.APPAJI,how nicely you deal your devotees for their welfare without their attempts for it.SGD
JGD APPAJI – Good message from Puttuji. We need these to be practised by each & every individual. As the current generation forgetting about taking care of their parents and what about other elderly people. Jsut a few good words with them make their day go happily. Thank you for sending this type of MMS as we are once again remembered of respecting the elderly people – SGD
Govinda, Sachchidananda Namo Namaha.
I guess, we will only know “their state of mind” when we get to that age. Every bit of help and love we tender to them sure should make them very happy. Thank you, Appaji, for bringing up these small, small, yet profound truths to the fore of our minds! To follow this requires no additional “hard work” from our side, other than just keeping this truth in mind and following it. The music and the visuals of the video are really very pleasing to the heart, making the mms message to go right-in and blend with our inner being. Puttuji’s addressing of Appaji as Thathaji in his comments touches heart! Om Namo Hanumate Namaha.
Jaya Guru Datta, Sri Guru Datta, Om Namo Hanumathe Namaha
Om Sri Sadgurubhyo Namaha
Thank You, dear Swamiji, for Your love messages, so a truly good inspiration! I would like to come to see You in London, maybe it works, inch’allah! You are allways present with me.
Jai Guru Datta.
JAYA GURU DATTA
Great message i will follow this instruction more seriously then before ,
Om Namo Hanumate Namaha.
JAYA GURU DATTA! Only because of Appaji`s help, support and inspiration everything with my old mother has very much improved! I`m so happy about it! Endless thanks to You, my very very dear, beloved Sadgurudeva! My humble pranams to Your holy lotusfeet. S.G.D.!
jgd “aisi vaani boliye mun kaa aapaa khoye, auran ko sheetal karey aapahun sheetal hoye” (we should be humble in our talk, it will have a cool calm effect on others, we will also enjoy the same coolness. It is possible if we are grateful to God Who gave us this beautiful gift of elderly people who need a little sweet careful timely exchange of talk from their own ones thank You Swami ji to teach us human values which are at stake. onhn sgd
Jaya Guru Datta, dear Puttuji
thank you so much for giving such a deep explanation. The difficult part might be to really have “communion” with elders in my family (communication!). But with the grace of Sri Swamiji anything goes. May Lord Dattatreya help me to make the right priorities in my life!
What a beautiful reminder, as we too in time will be considered elderly.. Treat persons the same way you wish to be treated especially our elders as they have all played an integral role in who we are today…. jaya guru datta
Topic: Speak lovingly to the elderly
Date: Sept 11th
video id: 49092266
What a beautiful piece of advice to start the day with! As social animals, being kind to fellow human beings is our basic duty. The norm of respecting elders is unique to the human race and we must preserve such unique traits of our species. They are the instantly accessible repository of our traditions and values and the least we can the do and the most they expect from us are a few words with love and care. Irrespective of caste, religion, nationality and race, respect and love for elders is a common feature but is expressed differently in different cultures. Uttering polite words itself is a virtue that every one of us must cultivate. The ability to be polite and pleasing under all circumstances requires great self-control. But the natural state of being ever pleasing and blissful is one that is attained by very few. Great are such souls that can be in a state of constant bliss: Sat-chit-ananda! We can see that our beloved Sri Swamiji, is always in such a state of happiness. When engrossed in Navavarna puja or while performing Namasankeertana in an ecstatic state or when simply sitting in a chair on the dias and smiling at the devotees or even when chiding us for being an unruly crowd: there is a clam, an undisturbed peace in Sri Swamiji’s eyes. Such is the state where true happiness exists which is why even a mere glimpse of Sri Swamiji makes us experience the same peace, the same happiness.
Jaya Guru Datta
Jaya Guru Datta Appaji..i will speak lovingly to elders and respect them always.. Sri Guru Datta
I do not know if I qualify to call myself as an elderly person. Yet, I would love it if people would speak to me lovingly. I would love it if they showed patience with me. I would love it if they cared to consider my convenience and comfort. I would love it if they gave me their cheerful company and shared some of my interests and beliefs. It would give me much happiness. I do not know if age alone makes a difference. There are millions of lonely people out there in the world who need kindness.
Just be kind and considerate to lonely persons. They may be old, young or middle-aged. They may be rich, poor or middle class. Loneliness is universal. Lonely persons need friendship, caring and encouraging words, and ears that are willing to listen. Let us lend them our ears and our smiles. It will make a difference in the world. Let us show patience and understanding.
JGD Appaji
How can we forget our parents and elderly..who have only showered us with Love and Blessings throughout our life.. for instilling us with good values and traditions..for showing us our Guru with whose blessings only we got such parents..we should be forever indebted to our parents and elders for their presence in our life. Let us give them all the love they deserve and much more.